The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
But break dance skills will only take you so far
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
