I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Randomize
