i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
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