Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
