Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
