So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
