NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I seem to have left my pride at pride
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize
