I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
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