woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Randomize