kristin has been a bad kristin
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
