oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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