Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
