I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
