a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
We need to rekindle our bromance
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
