ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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