these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
