So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Randomize
