I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
she peed on how many people?
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
