Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
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