You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Randomize
