i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
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