So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
