So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Randomize
