I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
