the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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