don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
