I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
