Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Randomize
