If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Randomize
