you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Randomize
