The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
