So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize
