So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Randomize
