Taylor Swift is so right about you.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
