just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Randomize
