dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Randomize
