remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
