There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
Rumble strips road head = magical
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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