no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
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