ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
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