How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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