We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
