take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Randomize
