dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
