Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
