I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Randomize
