i don't like sucking hair
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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