hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Randomize
