We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
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