I never want to see another naked old woman again.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
