i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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